Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Ooh ooooh!

"And how many of you are planning on using toxic Western medication to drug your baby for your own selfish comfort?"

I think it would be really amazing to have a natural childbirth, but I just don't know that I have the confidence that it's the right choice for this point I'm planning on an epidural. I've heard plenty of good and bad about epidurals and natural births, so who really knows what the best option is. I think it's different for everyone, and probably a choice you have to re-evaluate with each pregnancy.

What have your experiences been? Which birthing methods/classes did you use?

Pregnamares - My new name for Pregnancy Dreams...

I used to think things like cravings, 'pregnant brain,' mood swings, and crazy dreams were all over-hyped and cliche. Now that I'm pregnant and experiencing all of these things, I feel guilty for shaking my head at them before...and I think karma is coming for me now...

THE DREAMS. Oh my. I should start writing them all down, because I've had so many strange ones I can't remember them all anymore. I probably wake up and tell Sean about my weird dreams at least 3 times a week. My most vivid and memorable so far involved (and this is not a joke...): zombies from The Walking Dead, Dinosaurs, Aladdin (yes, the Disney character), and a Mexican drug cartel. WHAT?!?! How does a brain even put those things together? It was terrifying.

Sunday, December 14, 2014

Spilling the Beans

We told our families we were pregnant almost right away. I just couldn't keep it a secret! We have a dog, Zero, who we love like a child. He is seriously spoiled rotten. Sleeps-in-bed-under-the-covers-with-us spoiled. We got him a dog tag that says, "Big Brother." He wore it to dinner at Sean's parents one night and we got his mom to look at it and read it. At first, she was thinking we might be getting another dog, but when I shook my head, she pointed and mouthed, "YOU?" And then the whole family just lost it. So much excitement. This will be the first grandbaby on Sean's side (but not by much, or maybe at all! My brother- and sister-in-law are due with their first just a few weeks after us!!!).

I called my mom the day I found out. She's my best friend. I just had to tell her. I didn't even think of a sneaky/cute way to tell her, I just blurted it out. Unfortunately, she was grocery shopping and started crying in the middle of the store :) (maybe my crying's not a pregnancy might just be genetics).

I also told a few friends from work pretty early. They coach cross country with me and I felt like I needed to explain why I was being such a lazy they're two of my really good friends and, like I said, I'm horrible at keeping secrets!

We told the rest of the world after our 12 week ultrasound, which was a couple weeks before Thanksgiving. My students were SO excited. It was so fun to tell them and I loved their reactions. They still ask me (sometimes awkward) questions all the time about the baby and are just so excited. There is a daily bump watch in my women's choir class...(see, awkward :))

Now the whole world knows, and I am glad. It's so fun to be able to talk about it and hear other people's stories. I definitely think anyone who says they love being pregnant is an alien...but it's definitely an exciting adventure!

Trimester 1: uuuuuugghhh

The first 12 weeks were not fun times. Not at all. I was nauseous, exhausted, picky about food, and weirdly emotional. I cried when my family pulled out my baby pictures, because I was not a cute baby...and I was afraid that I was not going to have a cute baby...and they were making fun of me. I cried the first time I ate baco n while pregnant because it was just SO GOOD! I cried when I watched commercials about babies, or dog babies, or cat babies, or any other kind of babies. I cried when I had to go to work in the morning. I cried when I was at work and couldn't take a nap. Ha ha was a little rough there for a while.

I wanted to make a list of food things...because seriously, some of them have been pretty funny:

EGGS! *insert gagging sound here*
Chocolate/rich sweets
Diet coke (whaaaa?????)

Anything salty and/or sour - cheese is the bomb, potato chips are delightful, fruity/sour candy rocks my world, pickles are perfection (that's a pregnancy cliche, I know, but for real...have you had a pickle lately?),

I didn't exercise, um, at all during the whole first trimester. I walked my dog every day and I kinda sorta tried to go to cross country practices (I was one of the coaches of the I always went, but didn't usually run). I was pretty miserable with the state of my diet and exercise during those first few months...I just really struggled feeling so sick all the time.

We got to have an ultrasound at 8 weeks, which just floored me. I saw this little blob on the screen and saw its little heart beating and I just couldn't believe it. At 12 weeks, we got to see another ultrasound, and this time IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE A BABY! Identifiable parts and all! Ha ha. This time, we got to hear the heartbeat, and it was just a miracle. I just cried (some more).

Finding Out

Sean and I had just started trying to get pregnant, and I tried hard to convince myself that it would most likely take quite a while to conceive. As soon as I realized I was late (like...half a day late), I got so distracted by the thought that I might be pregnant, I couldn't focus on anything else! I was driving myself crazy because I thought, "Surely you are NOT pregnant, you need to WAIT AND SEE." Well...I hate that phrase. I hate waiting of any kind. I am the least patient person I know. I just had to know, so I took a test the second I got home from work.

I truly expected it to be negative, and although that would have made me sad, I would have been able to move on with my week and focus on work and the rest of life. I set the test on the bathroom counter to process and went to make the bed. While I was cleaning up, I heard Sean's truck pull up in the driveway. I went into the bathroom to check the test - expecting to see the negative result and toss it in the trash - and when I read the "p" word on that stick, I just about died. I actually dropped the test in the sink, gasped and covered my mouth, and started at myself in the mirror. Then I looked at my stomach like I expected something to immediately start to happen, ha ha :)

Unfortunately, when Sean got home, he wasn't alone. His brother Derek was with him. I waited for a few minutes for them to wrap it up so I could tell Sean, but no luck...they were deeply involved in some kind of dude conversation about manly hobbies and they were in no hurry. I just couldn't take it! I hopped in the car with some excuse about having to pick up cheese for dinner or something. I drove to the store and bought: 1) another pregnancy test (different brand, 'cause what if the first one was lying?!) 2) Baby socks...because...for real...cutest article of clothing in existence and I needed something else to put in the gift bag for my daddy-to-be husband

I got home and took the second pregnancy test. It, too, came out positive. I may have danced around the bathroom waving the pee stick in the air and cry-laughing...

I wrapped up the tests and the cute little baby socks in a gift bag and set it on the table. When Sean came in,  told him he had to open that bag and see what I got today. He assumed it was a present from a student, so it really threw him for a loop when it was pregnancy tests and socks...:) The smile on his face was just absolutely priceless. He scooped me up in the biggest hug and I just cried from happiness.

Naturally, the next thing I wanted to do was call the doctor. But, it was after hours. When I did make that phone call the next day, it went something like this, "Hi, I think I'm pregnant. What do I do?!"

I'm blogging! I'm in a room...and I'm blogging!

I am pregnant with my first lil' baby and so excited that I just want to write down/share/discuss every single detail. But...that's too much for a lot of people, so instead of blowing up Facebook, I'll keep myself a little online journal here in the form of this blog.

Feel free to read (and laugh or scoff or cringe or whatever...) and comment with your own experiences and stories! I love this new community of moms and future moms that I feel like I'm a part of now, and I love hearing about other women's experiences (ahem, read: it's nice to know I'm not alone, because pregnancy is so, so weird). we go!